Ela Kasper (left) with Rachel Creighton

Note: Ela Kasper volunteered with Touchwood for 8 days at the beginning of August to help run our final pilot projects, Kids Bushcraft and the Reinvention Sewing Lounge. This is her take on how it all went and her experience as a volunteer – Rachel.

We did it! It was a busy week but we succeeded – we ran three fantastic events.

From the moment I and two other volunteers, Rachel and Minhaj, arrived in Kirkwall, we started planning and discussing the details of the projects. After four days of collaboration we were ready for the first challenge: Kids Bushcraft.

And it went smoothly – we filled our tipi with happy kids, a few parents, a lot of fire and two journalists.

Kids Bushcraft

Malcolm firstly introduced our audience to certain plants and their properties. Stinging nettles are used to make ropes and you would use dock leaf to soothe nettle burn; meadowsweet smells of honey and is a painkiller; soft rush was used to make oil lamp wicks; plantain was used as a wound dressing; and thistle seed is soft and fluffy (oh, and it makes fire, too.)

After some ground rules were explained, Malcolm then used a  bow, piece of wood and a shell to create a fire. Boy, wasn’t that impressive! I heard “wow’s”, “oooh’s” and “aah’s” from all corners of the tipi.

Kids (and the parents) were eager to try making it themselves, and they did, and they succeeded. The four teams we divided people into all made fire! (Minhaj, Rachel and I failed miserably at the attempt.)

There was some time left so we let participants have another go, this time individually, and believe me that parents were as keen as the kids to try again. A photo reporter from The Orcadian took a few pictures, Malcolm and the kids were interviewed by Victoria from Orkney Today, we then tidied up and went to a pub to celebrate a job well done.…

The Reinvention Sewing Lounge

The next day was the premiere of the Reinvention Sewing Lounge. Our tipi was transformed from a simple shelter from wind and rain into a cozy living room with carpets, a stove, huge trunks, beautiful suitcases and a kitchenette for hot beverages and chocolates.

Kirsteen Stewart inspired and guided small sewing projects: scarves, little handbags, leg warmers; her advice was simply precious.

The atmosphere was unbelievable – the eight of us were concentrating on our own projects so much that we had nearly absolute silence with the only noise coming from scissors, threaded needles and Kirsteen’s encouraging praises. There was a huge selection of fabrics to choose from so I imagined it would take a long time to decide on a colour scheme and a project but no, 10 minutes after everyone arrived the work began.

My favourite project was a small evening bag, silky and shiny purple fabric on the outside and matching matt purple inside, with a gorgeous button for both decorative and practical purposes. Simply divine!

I had so much fun working on these three events and the people I met were unique. Malcolm, Rachel, another Rachel and Minhaj added so much to the experience.

We laughed, we learned, we discussed, we cooked, we went swimming, but most of all we all worked hard and we succeeded. Well done guys!

Transform the clothing that’s sitting in the back of your closet, gathering dust, into stylish one-of-a-kind pieces.

Join Kirsteen Stewart as she teaches you how to transform your wooly jumpers into this beautiful scarf:

Or if you know how to sew and want to try a different project, we’ll have several charming project patterns you can work on and a huge stack of gorgeous sewing books to draw inspiration from.

Beautiful fabrics available

Browse a gorgeous collection of fabrics

New pieces of fabric from Kaffe Fassett, Alexander Henry, Cath Kidston and Kirsteen Stewart will be on hand for purchase to combine with recycled clothing to make fetching, affordable pieces.

Thurs and Fri, Aug 5 and 6 at Orkney College

Our sewing lounge will be held for two days only at our stylishly furnished tipi. Come join us for gourmet coffee and tea and the delectable truffles from Cocoa Mountain.

Delicious truffles from Cocoa Mountain in Durness

We’ll be at the tipi on the lawn of Orkney College (right next to the car park) for 2 sessions only so be sure to book now if you’re interested as we only have 8 spaces available each day.

By the end of the two hour session, you’ll have something fantastic to take home along with the skills to create more projects at home.

Register and pay now >>

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Available dates

We have two dates available:

• Thursday, 5 August, 2-4pm
• Friday August 6, 2-4pm

Both sessions will take place on the lawn of Orkney College, Kirkwall. Click here for directions to the College from the Bus Station (next to the library).

Cost

£4 or FREE if you bring an extra item of clothing, curtains or fabric to donate to our collection — natural fabrics only such as 100% cotton, linen, wool or silk.

We’ll provide all tools. We’ll also have truffles from Cocoa Mountain for sale, alongside gourmet tea and coffee.

What to bring

Bring at least two items of clothing (ideally several) that you want to repurpose — jumpers in particular, or all natural fabrics. We’ll also have secondhand and vintage clothing you will be able to purchase.

Pre-booking required

Because we’re limiting the session to 8 people only, you must pre-book the session.

Register and pay now >>

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See you there!

From a poster for the new Reinvention Sewing Lounge, coming soon

It doesn’t look it yet, but below is the beginnings of the new Reinvention Sewing Lounge, one of our latest projects:

Soon our tipi will be furnished with sheepskin rugs, a woodburning stove, and a cornucopia of fabrics and craft tools to transform the clothes you’ve got sitting in the back of your closet into hip bags, pillows and something new you’d love to wear.

My favourite part: while you sew, you can sip gourmet coffee or tea and nibble on some of the best chocolate truffles I’ve ever had the privilege to sample (and I worked in a Belgian chocolatier’s in college so I know what I’m talking about).

The rebirth of sewing

The sewing lounge concept rides the crest of a modern, stylish crafting craze that’s huge in America and in cities and is gradually making its way here. With places like The Make Lounge in London, sewing has followed in the wake of knitting to become something trendy and hip, an activity that’s more about creative expression and socialising than just making something functional.

Recycling + making something better = “upcycling”

Touchwood’s take on it is to introduce the element of upcycling, or making something new and better out of something old. In our case, we’re asking people to bring a few items of clothing that are languishing in their wardrobes and bring them in for a makeover. I know I’ve been holding onto a silk jacket that’s the wrong colour and shape because I feel guilty about buying it and not wearing it — well now it could become a sleeping mask for me or a lovely pillow for a friend.

Or maybe you could turn a few moth-eaten sweaters into a scarf like this one:

Over the next couple weeks, I’ll start making labels, stringing up the solar-powered fairy lights, stoking the woodburning stove, and in general making it an Aladdin’s cave that people beat down the door to enter. The feel I’m going for is a bit of early 1900s English Empire with a dash of 1950s American retro.

Here’s some of the stuff I’ve gotten already:

Almost everything is secondhand, from the vintage tin trunk that will store the old sweaters, to the leather suitcases and hatboxes for supplies. I’ve trawled eBay and our charity shops for weeks hunting things down.

Inspiration from amazing books

I’ve got a huge stack of outstanding craft books for project ideas too which I’ll have in the tipi. I’m going to create little laminated cards with photos of projects that I’ll string up next to fabric so that people can get ideas for which project they want to work on while they’re here.

Show me the money

One of the biggest challenges we face with this project, and with Touchwood in the long term, is figuring out how to generate enough income to be sustainable. Because of our hybrid status as a business whose profits are channeled entirely into a social cause, we can receive grants to do community work, but our long-term goal is to be completely grant-free.

The problem is, the first 6 courses we did with the sewing pilot project taught us that many of the people here on the island are accustomed to things being heavily subsidised. I know my sewing course was about £45 for 8 weeks thanks to big subsidies, and when we asked people what they would expect to pay for a sewing course, some of the answers were £4(!)

Bear in mind this was having a professional sewing instructor on hand and all tools and materials provided for a 2 hour session. We knew when we ran it that there was much more we could be doing, and that’s what the sewing lounge is in part trying to explore.

So rather than charge a big fee upfront, can we earn income through sales of things like tea and chocolate alongside selling fabric? Charge £1, say, for a nice square of silk or eye-catching cotton print.

My thinking at the moment is to have two (at least) different types of sessions: one led by Kirsteen Stewart, a local fashion designer and sewing teacher, where you work on a specific project and learn specific skills, and another where people who already know the basics of sewing can come to work on their projects without an instructor. The first is more of a sewing class, the second is more a get-together.

We have 2-3 more grant-subsidised sessions to find out what will work.

Getting the pricing right

I’m thinking £4 entrance fee or free if you bring an extra item of clothing to donate. That’s for a two hour session where you can use all the tools we have. One or two of those sessions will also feature Kirsteen as instructor, but if she’s going to do it longer term, we’d have to charge at least £16 to be able to pay her.

We’ll also have the gourmet tea and coffee brewed on the woodburning stove and served up in these handmade mugs at £1.50, and chocolate truffles from Cocoa Mountain, based in Durness, at £1.25 each.

Secondhand wool sweaters will be sold for £6 and varying prices for some of the cottons and wools. Maybe Malcolm’s homemade soup for £2.50, though that gets into the realms of food, which may be too complicated.

We’re looking at 8-10 people at a time.

Show me the social purpose

The reason we’re doing all this?

Well the goal is to empower people by teaching them practical and fun skills which also help the planet by recycling materials that might otherwise be thrown away (just cause it goes to a charity shop doesn’t mean it won’t end up in landfill or being shipped far away — charity shops can only sell so much).

Our newly revised mission is to “empower you to make the world better”. I certainly have seen how knowing how to make something beautiful that’s homemade makes your world better and I’d like to help anyone else who agrees.

I don’t know if people will go for it, but the upside is if they don’t, think of all the yummy chocolate and hot drinks waiting for me.

How can we make this succeed?

What do you think? Have you been to a sewing lounge? What would make you go out of your way to attend ours if you lived here?

One of the challenges in starting up a social enterprise is actually having something to show for months’ worth of effort. Since an eco-lodge will take some time to build, not to mention write a business plan, do a feasibility study, and consult with the community, we needed to find ways of getting started NOW. So we’re building on the success we had with the StrengthsFinder pilot projects and running at least 3 more in 2010.

Here’s what we’re planning to do…

A mobile classroom

First up: a ‘mobile classroom.’ We’ve bought be a canvas tentipi like the one in this picture and are furnishing it with a stove and lovely fleeces, sheepskins and comfy chairs.

A tentipi offers shelter and warmth while still connected to the outdoors

These two photos here — from the Beautiful World Tents website — show how it could work.

Inside the tentipi with an open fire

The challenge of the Orkney (Scottish, British) climate is that it’s usually too cold or possibly rainy to contemplate doing something like a craft activity outside. On the other hand, we don’t want to go the route of being indoors in a community centre.

Tentipis are a modern update of the traditional tents used by the Sami. They look like tipis, but have a few cool features — like the ability to roll up the sides to open out the view.

Our plan is to kit them out beautifully and cosily, but still be able to take them around Orkney, including the more remote islands like Sanday, Eday, Shapinsay and Westray. We also plan to have a number of craft courses that will help furnish the interior with handmade rugs and fleeces.

Beauty, craftsmanship and eco-friendliness are core to what we want to do.

On to the courses…

Crafts and outdoor pilot projects

Bit Better Project

This project is all about living by the principle: ‘Leave it a little better than you find it’.  Going beyond Leave No Trace, we’ll work with farmers and local walkers to make the countryside through which they are travelling a ‘bit better’. It includes going out into the countryside with tools to make improvements to fences, waterlogged land, and other problems.

Upcycle Your Clothing

Not just recycling or reusing clothes you would otherwise donate or bin, but ‘upcycling’ to create something new, beautiful and wearable. Includes gathering local natural materials from outdoors, such as shells, stones and fibrous plants. Hip sewing courses delivered by a young, local designer called Kirsteen Stewart. I just took her dressmaking class and it was brilliant. We’re thinking one of the courses we’ll offer will be a ‘Knockout Knickers’ class where we make our own gorgeous underwear. Yee haw!

Kids Bushcraft

Hands-on sessions for kids in building shelters from heather, making fire safely, and navigating and walking outdoors via Treasure Hunts. This one is about rethinking what a ‘weed’ is and appreciate traditional skills and the natural environment.

Why pilot projects?

Well for one thing, we don’t actually have a place. We’re still mostly a lot of good ideas, a growing network of people, and lots of paperwork. So running this as a full-on enterprise just isn’t feasible.

But I also don’t want to fall into the trap of working for months, even years, on the Touchwood Project and not actually have something tangible to show for it. Too many projects I’ve heard about lurch from year to year, snapping at funding, beleaguered by internal politics and strife, and resulting in little more than lots of strategy documents and a logo. While I don’t think that will happen to us, we all want to make things happen as fast as possible.

Other benefits of doing a pilot:

• Work out logistics and get courses right for future rollout
• Get training for local people to deliver courses to highest standard
• Build ties to existing organisations and businesses on Orkney to co-offer courses
• Build awareness of Touchwood Project within larger community

Where we’re at now

Update: We’re running these three pilot projects now and through July, both on the mainland of Orkney and on outer islands like Sanday and Hoy. More details of dates and times to come.

If we don’t, one won’t happen and we will need to return those funds to Awards for All. Malcolm and I are too busy working on the first two and simply don’t have the time to manage all three, so I’m posting here to see if any of you would like to take part.

What’s the project?

The pilot we need help with teaches basic sewing skills through three different classes, each aimed at different types of people and will all be taught by Kirsteen Stewart, local fashion designer and sewing instructor at Orkney College:

“Upcycle” an item of clothing

2-hour or half-day session repurposing an item of clothing in your wardrobe. 12 sewing sessions planned with 3 separate courses:

• Make Your Own Creature for parents and young children
• Junky Style for teens and young adults
• Knockout Knickers for women to make their own knickers

What we need

Someone to act as Project Manager, to make sure this test case happens.

Are you someone who likes organising events? Would you enjoy contacting the local papers and radio to advertise the classes, or figuring out which dates and locations to run the event at?

We have a budget, venue, teacher and course description. The rest needs to be worked out by you and Kirsteen, with Malcolm and myself helping where possible.

What you don’t need to do

Be perfect. Since it’s a pilot, the project (and you) doesn’t need to be flawless — it’s designed to test whether there is an interest and need for courses like this on Orkney and potentially throughout the UK.

We’ll also be testing out how much to charge and where to run courses — we have a mobile classroom thanks to the “kata” tent we have purchased. We’ll do our best to run the courses like a business would, but the bigger goal is to test things out and see what works best.

Finally it’s a chance for Touchwood to lay the groundwork for offering courses in the future, the best of which will run one day at the eco lodge. We have many more potential projects in the pipeline, from building low-cost, eco-friendly houses to teambuilding, and these pilots teach us vital skills to enable us to make those courses a success.

Why volunteer

Because you are someone who likes to make things happen, who will be proud of the fact that this project couldn’t work without you. You enjoy organising things and want Touchwood to continue growing.

You and your family will also be able to participate in all of Touchwood’s projects free of charge, from the Kids Bushcraft courses to the Bit Better Project (countryside walking and trail repairs) to all three sewing courses.

Interested?

Email me at rachel@touchwoodproject.com if you’re interested and want to find out more.

You can also download the Pilot Projects Summary, which explains the projects and Touchwood in more detail, and the Sewing Pilot Project Budget.

Sure, we can give you a lift!

Why’s the bus service so bad?

Over a cup of tea, Malcolm heard the story from James Stockan, our councillor for Stromness and Hoy areas, while chatting about Touchwood’s mission of doing green living in a fun way. When Malcolm mentioned the latest one on hitchhiking, James said (I’m paraphrasing here):

“Know why the bus service is so poor? It’s because years ago, people used to stand waiting for the bus and invariably a fellow islander would stop to offer a lift, so no one was left for the bus to take.”

How about that. Giving a lift to someone used to be commonplace.

I like to imagine little old ladies standing at the bus stop waiting when another one comes along and offers her a lift. They chat on the side of the road, maybe one offers a helping hand into the car and away they go.

Giving a lift to someone is a chance to catch up on news, perhaps even to make a new acquaintance. You never know who you might run into.

Just think who you might meet, giving a lift

We could do with more getting to know each other too

Even here, we could do with getting to know each other better. There are 16,000 of us or so on the Mainland (Orkney’s main island) and while I’m sure there are many who know quite a few people, we don’t actually all know each other. What’s more, I also know a lot of people who moved away because they didn’t feel connected to the community, like they were part of things.

Something like half the population isn’t from Orkney originally, so that’s a lot of people moving in and trying to get to know their neighbours and where things are.

How much nicer would it be if you just moved in, walked down the road, stuck your thumb out and struck up a conversation with someone you’d never met; you got the insider tip on the best butcher, where to get a kitchen table cheaply, and where to find the tastiest espresso?

Think that might make you feel more welcome? More a part of the community?

It could work in big communities, too

Now I imagine doing this in larger communities, cities even. Think of the opportunities for increasing community spirit, a sense of connectedness to one’s neighbours.

One thing stopping people is fear. Maybe another is just not thinking about it.

It’s important to show it can be done, safely and enjoyably, and that’s why I’d like to see it work here on Orkney. We’re ridiculously safe here and we’ve already got a bit of a tradition of it — now it’s time to reintroduce it!

What needs to happen to make it work

As for fear, the perception of risk is disproportionate to the reality. Nevertheless, Malcolm is working on fail-safe measure to ensure modern carsharing is safe (more on that in future posts).

James says he used to always stop for someone, but the reason he doesn’t stop anymore is because there are a lot more cars on the road now and with few laybys, he’d be holding people up if he stopped.

We could largely deal with that problem by doing a bit of awareness-raising on the radio and in the paper to remind people of this tradition and encourage them to at least be patient when someone in front of you stops for 30 seconds to offer a lift.

Or we could even invest in a couple of laybys in the busiest areas, like heading out of Kirkwall and Stromness.

The point is, I guess I’d been thinking of this hitchhiking thing as a kind of new-fangled thing, and here it turns out (like just about every other green idea) people were doing this long before my generation popped up. Nice to know, really.

Hitchhiking is something I associate with grubby guys, desperate backpackers, and the occasional kidnapping or worse. I have some notion that it’s even illegal in some countries.

So suffice it to say that when Malcolm approached me with the idea of hitchhiking I was skeptical — I believe my response was “No way in hell.”

Malcolm's thumb, ready for a lift

However, I’m rethinking my staunch opposition and am coming around to believing that in fact, done right, hitchhiking could be a wonderfully effective way to meet local people, improve ties in a community, save money and help the planet too.

Not a bad haul for sticking your thumb out.

Our effervescent lorry driver who gave us a lift

No longer a hitchhiking virgin

So I finally tried hitchhiking with Malcolm when we were in Ireland a few weeks ago and it was great. I had fun!

A lorry (rig/18-wheeler) driver picked us up, rucksacks and all, and spent the next 15 minutes to the town we were heading to regaling us with tales. Here’s our benefactor on the right.

Let me tell you, I felt more connected to Ireland in that moment, more of an experiencer (I’ll just make up that word) of the place than an observer or tourist, than I did at any other time. I was meeting and talking with someone who lives and works there, who sees the country all the time and has plenty of observations to share.

Malcolm calls his approach to hitchhiking 5 star hitchhiking because it’s about choosing it for the benefits it brings you and others. I’ll let him enumerate on those in later posts, but for now, let me share the true story Malcolm wrote about one experience he had hitching and you can judge for yourself.

Edinburgh to London fast and free

Years ago I was in Edinburgh with a girlfriend. She was leaving the city on a coach for London and I was devastated when I couldn’t book a seat on the coach too. I waved her off with a tear in my eye. With no desire to do anything on my own I was lost and restless. Nor did I have money to overcome the loneliness. I felt crap.

I opted to get “out of there” and decided to hitch “anywhere”. So I walked to the local bus stop and got on a bus going west, out of town, towards the ring road, past Corstorphine and the Zoo. Then I sulkily put out my thumb and trusted to whatever showed up.

I got a lift, towards Glasgow. Then another lift onto the A74 southbound, still unsure of what I was doing or where I was going. I dunno, maybe home to North Wales or maybe the mountains of the Lake District?

Well, my next lift took me into England quickly and it started to dawn on me that this was the same route my girlfriend’s coach would be taking, down the M6, to London. I started to look out for a National Express coach. My driver was in a hurry, doing well over 100 mph, at times I worried we would not survive.

Anyhow, to keep the story short, I got it into my head to chase the coach, and I started to calculate relative speeds, and the head start the coach had on me. It seemed worth trying and my lifts were taking me that way. But no sign of any express coach.

It was going great until I reached the Luton area, north of London on the M1. I was dropped off at a service station, just as light was fading. After the toilets I got a quick coffee and a pen, then wrote a sign saying LONDON, then I walked out past the petrol station to the exit road onto the motorway.

My heart sank. There was a long line of hitchers, at least a dozen, scattered out along the grass verge. And not your smart looking hitchers either. It looked like the photo line up for the police station, and they were all ahead of me. So close but it seemed my hopes were dashed, the chase was lost. I stood and watched. Hardly any cars were passing, maybe one a minute max. None were stopping. Everyone looked miserable and territorial. I was just one more nuisance. I kept out of the way.

A truck stopped, one guy jumped up and went. The queue shuffled a bit. 10 minutes and nothing. It was starting to drizzle and was getting dark, making us all look like shifty shadows. Criminals one and all. A car stopped mid way along the queue and took a very thankful hitcher away. No one moved. So I filled the gap and sat down, depressed.

I paid no attention to the cars as I had to wait for all these others to go first, so I just inked in my sign a bit better, preparing for the dark of night. It was going to be a long night and I had nowhere to go. I had nothing better to do, so I just kept writing LONDON over and over, darker and darker, straightening the lines of the letters, doodling. Then I wrote “please” beneath it, reflecting my sense of desperation.

The sign that made all the difference

I was cold, nothing was happening. Some hitchers drifted off, and the 10 or so of us remaining strung out as if to get as far from each other as possible. I noticed all were trying to get lifts, the queue didn’t exist, it was a fashion contest or a parade of rough and grimy folks. One guy was on crutches, poor bloke. Another scared me, so I looked away. We all hitched, like fish trying to get hooked.

A car drove past me – a nice car, a Jaguar – and stopped further down the line. A guy jumped to the door and spoke to the driver then looked up and shouted at me. I didn’t understand. He shouted again, loud! He beckoned me with his arm. I picked up my bag (I was not letting that out of my sight) and walked up. “He wants you” said the hitcher.

I was in the Jaguar, purring down the motorway, next stop London. 12 cylinders hummed. The seats squeaked and smelt of real leather. The clock ticked silently. It was dark outside and the road was empty, as we accelerated well beyond legal limits again. We felt above the law, wrapped in such wealth. The driver, dressed in a smart suit, didn’t say much, other than this:

“I have never given a lift to anyone before – and I never expect to do so again – but you had the courtesy to say ‘please’, so I wanted to help you”.

Well, I told him why I was heading into London, chasing my girlfriend, the journey from Edinburgh, the coach fully booked. He drove me to Paddington station, gave me the money for the Tube (underground) and cruised off. I caught a train to Victoria coach station, arriving 20 minutes after the coaches arrival time. Can you believe it? After all that. All alone at a coach station again.

I was walking out of the station when in came a coach, the delayed Edinburgh coach! I hid behind a pillar, almost too weak to stand. The passengers all got off – and there she was!

I had beaten her to London, faster than the Express (non-stop) coach. You should have seen her face! We hugged.

This story is true. I print it here to be inspirational and informative.

An all-women StrengthsFinder session

This second group was women-only, and after the results from this evening, I’m definitely keen to develop more sessions.

I went to an all-women’s university, Bryn Mawr College, and and I learned there to value enormously what can happen when you get a group of curious, motivated women together. Somehow the barriers fall away, laughing begins, and ties get established even between people who have never met before, as was the case today.

We started at 2pm, a small cosy group of 5, gathered around the fire crackling and the display of munchies to keep us going for several hours. We each read aloud our top strength, then asked the person to say to what extent they felt that accurately described them. Then for those of us who knew each other at least somewhat, we could offer our own view on how they saw a particular strength being shown in a person.

So for example, one woman who I’ve only met a few times had Developer as her top strength. The ‘Developer’ strength is about seeing unique qualities in every single person, valuing them, and then to some extent ‘developing’ that strength in the person. I could completely see that in her, even with my limited contact, because throughout the discussion itself, she was drawn to asking each of us about our strengths, taking note and offering encouragement that made each of us somehow feel incredibly special, that we each had such gifts that she recognized and treasured.

Another woman had Discipline as her top talent. Her strength meant she is very organised, tidy, and great at meeting deadlines. She talked about making a To Do list for the week and then crossing each task out as it was completed. The rest of us were in awe. We half-seriously asked if she could help us all get organised. Of the 5 of us, she was the only one actually on time for the start of the discussion.

A third woman had Activator as her top strength, which again was no surprise to me. She has been staying with us for a few days and regularly looks around for things she can do, projects to tackle. An almost restless energy radiates from her and already she’s looking at how we could plant a garden, fix my bike, and draw some sketches for Touchwood.

We each provided some food and drink and I made sure to have plenty of cushions, good music (ranging from Thievery Corporation to South African Legends) on the iPod, and the fire always topped up. You could see the sea from the two windows on either side of the fire, and a few candles burning on the mantlepiece. A good ambiance makes all the difference.

The value of discussing your strengths with others

I think the biggest value in discussing strengths with other people is that they point out to you ways in which you show that particular strength. So often, we take for granted what comes easily, so my top theme of Ideation, which is about loving new ideas and their connections, would never seem like a ‘strength’ until it was pointed out to me that I never would have started Touchwood with Malcolm without it.

Same strengths, very different interpretation

Oddly, all five of us had Input in our top 5, but they each were described very differently. For two of us, Input was about collecting information in many ways for the benefit of others — one woman was reading a book about Asperger’s because she knew someone whose child had it.

For another, it was about methodically and thoroughly processing data and facts in order to make sound, objective decisions, whereas I definitely skim and skip around to find nuggets of useful information.

At one point the question of ‘What do we do with this?’ was raised, and I mentioned the action items they give you after each strength. So I consciously post websites I think other will find useful or interesting on Facebook as part of developing my Input theme and helping others.

But I don’t have the time/it’s a luxury

What about feeling that spending £12/$15 on some personal assessment tool is self-indulgent or something that you’ll do someday but not anytime soon because you’ve already got so much on your plate?

As one member put it, it’s about improving your self so you can help others (this was the Developer one, and her second theme was Individualization, which is also about recognising abilities in every person and helping them develop their unique gifts — her staff are lucky).

We spend so much time criticizing ourselves for not doing more or better — why not spend that time looking at what we do well and making the most of it?

Overcoming the challenges to doing more sessions

So all in all, I definitely want to do more of these. The energy, laughter and sense of connectedness were just too good to not do more.

The main challenge is getting people to try it. I think a lot of people, dare I say especially British folks, are often pretty wary of things that smack of American self-help. They fear it’ll be a lot of navel-gazing and smarmy self-congratulation.

Others are nervous about talking about something that feels highly personal, leery of revealing things to people they don’t know — or perhaps worse, do know.

So I’ll need some help figuring out how it could work. I’d really like this to be a part of what we offer at Touchwood, particularly combining it with outdoor or craft activities so it’s all kept fun and easy-going.

Malcolm tending his fire New Years Eve

But too often these days, we act as perpetual children, looking out only for ourselves and what we want.

When does a boy become a man?

One of the phrases that really summed this up for me comes from last night’s viewing of Lars and the Real Girl (an absolutely brilliant film) where Lars asks his brother, Gus, ‘How did you know you were a man?’ and his brother says:

There’s still a kid inside but you grow up when you decide to do right, okay, and not what’s right for you, what’s right for everybody, even when it hurts.
Lars: Okay, like what?
Gus: Like, you know, like, you don’t jerk people around, you know, and you don’t cheat on your woman, and you take care of your family, you know, and you admit when you’re wrong, or you try to, anyways. That’s all I can think of, you know – it sound like it’s easy and for some reason it’s not.

We want to run a 21st century take on the ancient idea of a rite of passage to manhood. And being who we are, that’ll naturally include bushcrafty things like making fire and building shelter.

It’s not about being macho

But it’ll also include things like cooking, cleaning and repairing a community building. Because, at least from our perspective, being a man isn’t about being macho (or being weak for that matter either) — it’s about doing the right thing, being a steward for your community. It’s about being gentle and caring, the wise tribal leader rather than the hot-blooded young warrior.

As Malcolm says all the time, it’s about ‘leaving things a little better than you find it‘.

We’ve submitted the initial application and should know in 2 weeks whether we’ve been shortlisted.